Rowing, Sex, and Lightweights...Oh My!

A few oldies but goodies for you (and if you're new to the sport, something new to laugh about).

Top 10 Reasons Why Rowing is Better Than Sex

1. You can row with minors and not get arrested.
2. You do not have to worry where your oar has been before.
3. Two words: "Cox Box".
4. You can row with up to seven other people at the same time.
5. Your oar will never give you a S.T.D. (except crabs).
6. Female rowers give Head races a new name.
7. Let's face it, it's not.
8. When rowing you have a coach to tell you what you did wrong.
9. After a good hard row, everybody is satisfied.
10. In rowing, the catch is aggressive, the hands quick, the slide smooth, the drive powerful, and the oar is always hard.

Top 10 Reasons Why Athletic Directors Will Not Make Rowing a Varsity Sport

1. There will be more rowers than football players.
2. Not enough injuries for athletic trainers.
3. Team graduation rate is too high.
4. Team GPA is too high.
5. Can win by sitting on your bum and going backward.
6. There is no offense or defense in rowing; all rowers do the same thing; there are no incredible plays during competition.
7. Coaching staff is too small.
8. No need for maintenance crew to maintain practice and competition sites.
9. No extensive recruiting budget.
10. Does not generate revenue.

Top 10 Reasons Why People Row Lightweight

1. LOVE IT, LIVE IT, ROW IT!!!
2. It's skill, not size, that matters.
3. Definition is sexy.
4. They're scrawny.
5. Endurance training increases libido.
6. It's better than being a butt-weight.
7. They like the feel of Saran Wrap on their body.
8. The lack of protein stimulates growth.
9. The extra layers of clothing compliment figure.
10. To meet incredibly interesting people in the sauna.